Intro to Melina Leigh :-s
Hello, and Welcome to my blog! I thought I’d start with the ever so cliché “Get to know the Writer” Post. Unfortunately, it cannot be avoided, so we might as well just jump right in! I promise to try to keep it short!
My name is Melina Leigh.
Except that it isn’t. Melina Leigh is a pen name.
Once upon a time, not so long ago, I had a blog under my legal name. I fully subscribe to the idea brought by Lorrie Moore, “Write something you’d never show your mother or father.” It’s great in theory. It’s a great approach, it’s freeing. You cannot truly write…you know, get down to the brass tacks of it all when you are hindered by the what if’s, the what will people think, by censoring yourself. I do my best to write “uncensored,” if you will, and was very happy with the results.
However wonderful an approach, however wonderful a theory, when you do not have the right support system, that sort of writing has potential to blow up in ones face. Without going into all of the gory, awful details, that is what happened to me.
I am very much aware that writing under a pen name flies in the face of everything that I just talked about. Know that I HATE it. But, since apparently, many of my topics are embarrassing, hurtful, and too graphic for my prudish family, it is the only way for me to put out the pieces that I want to put out. I have struggled with this for six or seven weeks; to me, if I could not write under my real name, there was no reason to write. I was not embarrassed by a single one of my posts, nor did I regret posting anything. But, they were, and since I tend to flee from conflict, I took it all down to keep the peace. It was a war I could not win, and as much as I hate how defeatist that is, it is truth. I have spent much of the last seven weeks deeply hurt and angry; wanting support for this endeavor, for this hobby I enjoy so much. I was unable to write, in fact, I could barely sit in front of the computer screen without bursting into tears, I was so devastated. Truth be told, I’m still having technical difficulties in the writing department. This will be only the second piece I’ve finished in all that time, and this has taken far longer than necessary to write. But, I HAVE to write, I WANT to write…and, I have sought and found support elsewhere. I wish I had that familial support, and damn it, I should have it, but the reality is I do not. I have to deal with that, I suppose…and eventually I will. I must not let that get in the way of what I want. Look, I know that there is little chance of being “discovered” by a publisher, or whatnot, but in the short months of writing the first blog, I’ve begun to realize that self-publishing is a very viable option, and it’s something that I want to explore, if not tackle sometime in the future. To do that, though, I must have a blog, I must start a network, so I will just have to do it as Melina Leigh.
All of that being said, I do not know the specifics just yet of what I will be doing with this blog. At the moment, I am working 60 or so hours a week, and am exhausted, so writing has unfortunately been what has suffered (as well as housework, and cooking, and a number of other things). I also may or may not have ordered a last minute Christmas gift that needs to be hand-stitched (Ok, I totally did…stupid crafting websites get me every time!) so I don’t know how regularly I will be posting. The hope is to post every week or week and a half, but I do not know if that is realistic just yet. Whatever I do, I can promise the writing will be true. I will write as I had been, with everything I have. It may get a little crazy along the way, but I hope you can enjoy this journey with me.